Young savers: How do the oldsters react?

As I mentioned, this week, I'm hosting the Festival of Under 30 Finances. This Festival is the brainchild of one of the spunkiest bloggers around, Kira of Penny Foolish. Many of the Festivals begin with a question asked by the week's host.

Here's my question.

When you talk about your financial goals with people who are over 30 (your parents, coworkers, other bloggers, etc), how do they react?

And here's my answer.

I have gotten mixed reactions when I talk about personal finance with various people who are older than I am. I've often been surprised at how negative some of the responses were. My father, for example, pretty much laughs at me. He always hints that he thinks I'm a scrooge. I should buy a nicer car. I should buy a house in a more expensive neighborhood, etc. When I say, slowly so he can understand, "But Dad, I can't afford to do that." He just shrugs. Once when I was talking with my brother-in-law about retirement savings, my dad interrupted to say, "Retire from what? You're 20-something years old. Why are you even thinking about this?"

My mother is a good source of support at times, but she's not too consistent. Mostly, she thinks I should plan less and worry less. She thinks I should just trust that the universe will provide and it will be so. That's worked pretty well in her life (most of the time). Sometimes she and I talk about different options for spending less money, etc. So she swings between being optimistic, and, I would argue, a little unrealistic, and being pragmatic and having a good business sense. When she's in her more pragmatic moments, we share ideas, learn from each other, and get encouragement from each other.

I have a friend (she's in her mid forties) who resents that I have a lot of opportunity for saving early because I'm young. She claims that I have it easier because there's all this talk now about the instability of social security, and people my age expect to have to provide for themselves. She says she didn't know that when she was young enough to start saving early, and now she's screwed. I personally think that she made a good trade-off. When she was in her 20s, she was an artist and followed her dream etc etc. After several years of temping and living hand-to-mouth, the dream still hadn't panned out, so she went back to school and started a new career and has done well for herself. I find that inspiring, but I get kinda pissed when she acts like she is powerless to make her own way and make good financial choices, while I have it made because somebody told me early enough that I might be on my own for retirement income.

My sister, on the other hand, has just that perfect mix. She is definitely the big sister, giving me gentle advice and being my mentor. But she's also my biggest cheerleader. I can tell her, we're saving X amount, and she says, "wow, go you!" She is an extremely aggressive saver, so there is no chance I will ever save as much as she does (even if you discount the fact that her household income is several times what mine is, I will still never save the percentage of my income that she has always saved). This totally eliminates any competition we might otherwise have between us.

I do have a few offline friends, exactly 3 in fact, who are into personal finance. I don't see them too often, but when I do we can geek out together and talk 403b's and HSAs and IRAs and IPOs and all manner of acronyms and abbreviations. These are folks who are within a few years of my age, and have been really useful for me. It is so nice to have someone I can ask, "so, what did you pay for this house?" and instead of being offended, they can't wait to sit down and give me a 45 minute answer.

So, if you haven't already, submit to the Festival of Under 30 Finances. If you're over 30, you can still submit, as long as your posts clearly speak to the financial interests of people under 30. Don't submit more than one post, please, and don't submit the same post to more that one carnival. It's just bad form.

The deadline is on Wednesday. Festival comes out on Friday.